Thoughts on "Losing someone ... "

[Pegasus Unbound]

It's been a while since I last posted on this thread. With another Holiday coming for some of us this weekend, I thought it might be helpful to share some thoughts about getting through some difficult times again.

Some of our family members and close friends decided to get together and set up a 'beef and beer' fundraiser night for next weekend. We invited the family (wife and son) of a very special guy, Joe, who was lost in a tragic motorcycle accident last year.

We want to get together and celebrate the awesome life that Joe lead, share with his family some of our finest moments that we had with him, and hopefully even raise some funds to help his family at the same time.

Holidays are difficult, but family and friends help. Just a reminder:

"It's scary to think that one day, we're going to have to live without our Mother or Father, Sister or Brother, Husband or Wife. Or that one day, we're going to have to walk this earth without our best friend by our side, or them without us. Appreciate your loved ones while you can, because none of us are going to be here forever."
~Unknown.

The fundraiser is such a wonderfully beautiful idea, bravo.

I would like to add one very important thought if I may.

At times like this, it is vital to show love, compassion and support to those who are grieving; BUT there is something equally vital, if not more so.

Don't go overboard, the more "extra" attention we place on their situation, the more we could be adding to their pressure. Be careful about saying repetitious things like "Don't worry, it will get better with time", "You always have the memories", etc. as they only tend to heighten awareness of their loss. Instead, give them love, comfort and as many hugs as they want/need; but don't force the issue.

What @AluraMist is doing is fantastic! It brings people together in a happy and positive way to offer support instead of a funeral like environment where everyone stands around under a dark gloomy cloud of sad faces hiding behind fake smiles and awkward "support".

It has taken me years to finally say goodbye to my parents, and while time does heal it still leaves scars. Without those scares there is no proof of the importance of that person in our hearts, so don't look away from the scars, instead embrace them with the memory of that special loved one as proof they did exist.

It's been over a decade since we lost @Lady Stormrider but the scars remain as I remember all the things she did and meant to us. It hasn't been a year since we had to say goodbye to @Lady Cat and the scars are still fresh and painful; but I can say that I have my everlasting proof that these very special people played an important role in my life.

Easter is not about the sadness of the ultimate sacrifice that Jesus made for us, but a time to reflect on what his sacrifice gave and gives us still. Sure, I am sad someone had to die for my own salvation, but I am joyful that there was someone who loved us enough to make that very incredible sacrifice. Through his sacrifice we learned that death is not the end...it is only just the beginning of our next incredible journey.

Don't mourn the loss, rejoice in the life.

I offer love and hugs of compassion and support to those who need them.

[Arwen Mythweaver]

It's been a while since I last posted on this thread. With another Holiday coming for some of us this weekend, I thought it might be helpful to share some thoughts about getting through some difficult times again.

Some of our family members and close friends decided to get together and set up a 'beef and beer' fundraiser night for next weekend. We invited the family (wife and son) of a very special guy, Joe, who was lost in a tragic motorcycle accident last year.

We want to get together and celebrate the awesome life that Joe lead, share with his family some of our finest moments that we had with him, and hopefully even raise some funds to help his family at the same time.

Holidays are difficult, but family and friends help. Just a reminder:

"It's scary to think that one day, we're going to have to live without our Mother or Father, Sister or Brother, Husband or Wife. Or that one day, we're going to have to walk this earth without our best friend by our side, or them without us. Appreciate your loved ones while you can, because none of us are going to be here forever."
~Unknown.

Thank you for posting this. Just today I had to go over to mother’s apartment to solve yet “another” -as I sometimes think - problem.
(She can’t get out).
On the drive over I could feel my irritation growing.

As I left I knelt down by her chair to say goodbye and looked right into her face. I thought for the first time in a long time that someday she won’t be here anymore. She’ll be gone.

On the drive back home I was crying instead of feeling annoyed.

Appreciate your loved ones while they’re still here with you.
My impatience was not worth the grief that someday will consume me.

[AluraMist]

@Jonathan Greenflame -- thinking of you and your family ---

[Pegasus Unbound]

@Jonathan Greenflame -- thinking of you and your family ---

My thoughts and prayers are yours @Jonathan Greenflame...

[AluraMist]

This month and next month will be busy with the Holidays. For me, it’s Thanksgiving in November, Christmas in December, and then the beginning of a New Year. I find it difficult to focus on most days. I have mixed emotions during these months. On one hand, I am busy planning and looking forward to the celebrations. On the other hand, I take a step back and look at how things have changed.

The Holiday meals were a family tradition in the past. One large dining room table, and a side ‘kiddie’ table, on both Thanksgiving and Christmas. Now my family has grown up, and things have changed. The children are now parents (and grandparents), and the grandchildren are starting their own families. Time is split between both sides of the families. It’s quite different now. But it’s still a joy spending time with my family!

Then I think about the loved ones I recently lost – a beloved Brother/Uncle who left behind a wife of 30+ years and a teenage son; a beloved Aunt who left behind a spouse, her nieces and nephews, and other family members; and a dear friend who left us way too early. And there is also my beloved fur-baby, Mufasa. After having him for 13 years, I miss him jumping up on my lap to snuggle as I relax in my recliner.

Even though they are not physically here with us, in my heart, I know that they never left. I believe they are watching over us and they are here with us, in spirit.

So, I “take a breath”, relax, and enjoy the time that I have today / now with my loving family. Creating new traditions can be healing. Making new memories does not erase my old memories. I will always remember my Loved Ones and I know that they would want us to enjoy the Holidays too.

Feel free to drop in anytime to chat. To paraphrase: “A burden shared is a burden halved".
Take care everyone.

[bluedreamer]

I'm so sorry for everyone's loss in recent times. My Nanna passed in 2020, and we all miss her. We are also, sort of, thankful she did not live through what followed.

[MzDreamfire]

It's coming up on a year the 13th that I lost my husband of 39 yrs. This past year has been a challenge in a lot of ways , sometimes it seems like everything is falling apart but yet we find a way to get through each day. I've been blessed with signs from him a few times that have astonished a couple of people who have been there when it happened lol. Last year we went through the holidays and family birthdays in November ,December, and January in a fog. None of us wanted anything to do with it but we made sure the little ones didn't suffer except they sure missed their Umpa.
My daughter and I were talking yesterday and she was saying how much my husband used to love the holidays before his Mom passed away (she died Christmas Eve). He would start the day after Thanksgiving looking for the *perfect* biggest tree he could find. He was in charge of that and the lights.
Sometimes wrapping himself in lights making my kids laugh and have to unwrap him.
She wants us all to honor him by getting back into Christmas for him this year, and to celebrate all our birthdays like he would have wanted us to. I know there will be moments it won't be easy but we'll do our best.
My Mom is 102 will be 103 in Jan and I can tell she's getting tired I just hope she can hold on.
I know I'm incredibly lucky to still have her and that she knows me and is mostly *there*.
I'm hoping she lasts to make it to 103.
Unfortunately my family has a habit of passing on holidays like Christmas, Easter, St Patrick's Day to name a few.

Guess we'll just hope for the best and do what we can to make this year a celebration of past memories while making new ones.

[Pegasus Unbound]

Once again, it is that time of year. The "festive" holidays that so many take for granted.

To each and every one of you in my "Central Family" I offer my love, hugs and warmest wishes during what is a difficult time for so many, myself included.

I am the last of my Family. No siblings, no parents, grandparents, etc. Most of them passed without me knowing it or even caring at the time. It took the loss of my estranged mother for me to fully understand the value of a family (Either by blood or the extended family). Both my parents passed during the Holidays and while I am sad at their not being around, I am happy we got to mend fences. I could just sit and feel sorry for myself, but instead I chose to cherish what happy memories I have and to move forward for them as well as myself.

Now, over a decade later I have a new family, I have you my "Central Family" who I get to visit with and share my thoughts and learn so much from. Like any family, there are some of you who are my "distant" relatives, and others I consider to be my closest and dearest.

Let's all stay close, and share when we need to share. Always know the magic that I have learned, there is always at least one healing hug here at Central when you need it...you just have to share so we know you need that extra bit of love and encouragement...and don't forget the hugs!

[AluraMist]

I have been very fortunate and I have not had to post lately. After the Holidays, and coming into the New Year, one of our friends, a close neighbor, passed away, suddenly and unexpectedly. She was a Nurse, with one adult son left behind. She was a pleasant, loving, caring person who is missed dearly.

And yesterday, my niece earned her Wings, and is now with her Mom, Dad, and sister, resting peacefully. This was also sudden and unexpected. After one week in Intensive Care, she lost her battle and passed away.

My thoughts are going towards some things that bring comfort to me. Sharing these here and hoping they might help someone else too. I recently reminded a dear friend that “A sorrow shared is a sorrow cut in half.” Sharing my sorrow, and these thoughts.

Images and Thoughts about the “Rainbow Bridge”

Photo of a real life “Rainbow Bridge”. - Extremely rare atmospheric phenomenon
called rainbow bridge or circumhorizontal arc,
when the sun is at least 58º above the horizon
and ice crystals in clouds form rainbows.



Photo of the real life “Rainbow Bridge Monument” (Utah). - Rainbow Bridge
Monument is often described as the world's highest natural bridge.
Paiute and Navajo groups named the bridge Nonnezoshe
or "rainbow turned to stone".



And now, imagine a comforting, symbolic “Rainbow Bridge”. –

“There are no goodbyes for us.
Wherever you are, you will always be in my heart.” ~Mahatma Gandhi

"Those we love don't go away. They walk beside us every day.
Unseen, unheard, but always near,
Still loved, still missed, and very dear." ~Unknown

[Pegasus Unbound]

I have been very fortunate and I have not had to post lately. After the Holidays, and coming into the New Year, one of our friends, a close neighbor, passed away, suddenly and unexpectedly. She was a Nurse, with one adult son left behind. She was a pleasant, loving, caring person who is missed dearly.

And yesterday, my niece earned her Wings, and is now with her Mom, Dad, and sister, resting peacefully. This was also sudden and unexpected. After one week in Intensive Care, she lost her battle and passed away.

My thoughts are going towards some things that bring comfort to me. Sharing these here and hoping they might help someone else too. I recently reminded a dear friend that “A sorrow shared is a sorrow cut in half.” Sharing my sorrow, and these thoughts.

Images and Thoughts about the “Rainbow Bridge”

Photo of a real life “Rainbow Bridge”. - Extremely rare atmospheric phenomenon
called rainbow bridge or circumhorizontal arc,
when the sun is at least 58º above the horizon
and ice crystals in clouds form rainbows.



Photo of the real life “Rainbow Bridge Monument” (Utah). - Rainbow Bridge
Monument is often described as the world's highest natural bridge.
Paiute and Navajo groups named the bridge Nonnezoshe
or "rainbow turned to stone".



And now, imagine a comforting, symbolic “Rainbow Bridge”. –

“There are no goodbyes for us.
Wherever you are, you will always be in my heart.” ~Mahatma Gandhi

"Those we love don't go away. They walk beside us every day.
Unseen, unheard, but always near,
Still loved, still missed, and very dear." ~Unknown

It was with great sorrow that I read your update. Words can never properly express our feelings, but please know that my love, support and prayers for you and yours are there for you all.

Despite any and all pain, I know you are and will cherish and surround yourself with the warm and comforting memories; especially when any shadows appear.

Should you need a shoulder or an ear...I am here.

Love & Hugs,

V